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The "Rules" |
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Baal 
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Joined: 01/21/2010 Location: unknown Status: Offline Points: 13936 |
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 Posted: 10/16/2019 at 5:55pm |
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Exception granted.
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Fulanodetal
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Joined: 06/28/2013 Location: Canada Status: Offline Points: 1216 |
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Posted: 10/16/2019 at 8:14pm |
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"Each sentence had fifteen words. There were also some words with three syllables. I understand now that this was too much for you and I apologize. I will try to keep it simple for you in the future."
I find this confusing since rule 82 was proposed by someone else... this is the one I was talking about... "Rule 82 (Proposed) For all players who have conceded the utter ineptitude of their backhands, despite years of deep and rigorous backhand rehab efforts of relentless diligence and effort, to forthright embrace with Mount Olympus devotion the religious belief in reincarnation, held with a Churchillian iron resolve, for plotting a vector upon the final backhand of this life, to the next being in shining karmic reward of returning as Andrzej Grubba." FdT
Edited by Fulanodetal - 10/16/2019 at 8:16pm |
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stiltt
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Joined: 07/15/2007 Location: USA Status: Offline Points: 162 |
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Posted: 10/16/2019 at 8:22pm |
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 I tested you; you pass.  Edit: I mention 88 to help you, 89 per se does not mention 88. 89 IS 88 but it’s too late.
Edited by stiltt - 10/18/2019 at 9:20pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/16/2019 at 9:10pm |
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I see. Yes, I agree. Fortunately that rule is not from the Table Tennis gods and the commenter was referred to Rule 6. To be honest, Rule 74 is even more explicit. I tried to let him down gently by suggesting that he can be reincarnated as whomever he wants. As long as he hardens the [email protected] up. The actual Rule 82 is : Rule 82. You are absolutely not allowed to try to win the points in the warm up. Save it for three minutes later or whenever it is that your actual match starts. If you fail to grasp this simple concept you are required to take remedial action. The simplest is to watch videos to see how elite players approach this with common courtesy. Alternatively, you could quit the sport. Ba'al has spoken. On behalf of the Gods of Table Tennis
Edited by Baal - 10/16/2019 at 9:25pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/16/2019 at 9:35pm |
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Heavyspin, wars have been started over the mere threat of this kind of thing.
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heavyspin
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Joined: 08/16/2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1368 |
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Posted: 10/17/2019 at 1:22pm |
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Don't think this has been mentioned.
If a disturbance occurs during a rally, such as a ball entering your court, you may either call a let immediately or not call let at all. You may not wait until the point has completed to decide retroactively whether or not the disturbance bothered you.
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A masseuse practicing social distancing rubs me the wrong way.
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stiltt
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Joined: 07/15/2007 Location: USA Status: Offline Points: 162 |
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Posted: 10/17/2019 at 5:01pm |
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It is true that his fh H3 National may appear boosted and not boosted at the same time depending what he wants to do. Additionally, color blind people confirm that the sponge of the said rubber may be blue and orange at the same time, they have no clue and confess that they don't give a flying ball.
Edited by stiltt - 10/20/2019 at 7:55pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/18/2019 at 1:18pm |
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It is also simultaneously a Stiga and a Viscaria.
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/18/2019 at 1:44pm |
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 head shot!!!
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Baal
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Posted: 10/18/2019 at 3:29pm |
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Following the laws of quantum mechanics, at least some interpretations, if someone other than FZD were to examine the blade it would collapse the wave function thus becoming either a Viscaria with a Stiga handle, or an actual Stiga, but at all other times, it is in a state of indeterminacy, thus being simulataneously both and yet neither (or perhaps multiple universes are created immediately, one in which it is a Stiga and one in which it is a Viscaria). However I am coming dangerously close to violating Rule 51 and physics is weird anyway. So I will have nothing more to say about this.
Edited by Baal - 10/18/2019 at 3:31pm |
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/20/2019 at 7:44pm |
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for genesis purposes, should we put in the OP that this amazing thread is a spinoff from that post?
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Baal
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Posted: 10/21/2019 at 1:34pm |
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And the definitive list has been compiled at the start of this thread.
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pitigoi
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Joined: 06/19/2015 Location: Illinois, USA Status: Offline Points: 195 |
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Posted: 10/21/2019 at 10:38pm |
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Proposed 91: If an unknown player asks you to hit, start stretching, check your phone, go drink water, or simply pack and go home.
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Right hand: Stiga Allround NCT (74g) /Rasant Grip max/Talon OX red (total 135g)
Left hand: Stiga Allround WRB (71g)/Vega Europe max/Innova Ultra Light max (total 153g) Fitness Friendship Fun |
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BRS
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Posted: 10/22/2019 at 11:26am |
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Idk, does that mean only French and Belgians are allowed to Allez!? Exhortations in native/first language only is a boring rule. No kom igen! unless the player is Danish? Boo.
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/22/2019 at 2:36pm |
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Can I sing Offenbach's Bacarolle, staring at my opponent? (starting at 1m02s)
Edited by stiltt - 10/22/2019 at 2:41pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/22/2019 at 7:16pm |
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Since few if any of the posters here are professional players (see Rule 2) this last discussion is essentially moot. No choing! And for God's sake no chanting either.
On another topic I have been asked how to comply with Rule 20 if you think you have found the perfect blade (for a ample, I have used a Viscaria since 2007). Recall that Rule 20 states: "The correct number of blades to own is n + 1 where n is the number you own now. An exemption can be made for players in committed relationships, in which case the correct number is s-1, where s is the number of blades that causes your spouse or partner to leave you. " The answer is easy. Simply buy more of them. After all you need a spare and a spare for the spare. And a black tag one marks you as a Man of Distinction and a Big Spender. Etc. Etc. I hope this helps people needing guidance.
Edited by Baal - 10/22/2019 at 7:18pm |
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mts388
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Joined: 03/21/2014 Location: Sonora CA Status: Offline Points: 2139 |
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Posted: 10/24/2019 at 12:53pm |
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Proposed 92 When playing at the club or a tournament, do not wear the the clothes you slept in the night before.
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Baal
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Posted: 10/24/2019 at 1:06pm |
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Yes, this would be akin to wearing black socks.
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heavyspin
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Posted: 10/25/2019 at 1:09pm |
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On club nights, if an undesirable opponent asks you to play and you make the excuse "I'm done playing for the night" you are not allowed to play later that night.
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A masseuse practicing social distancing rubs me the wrong way.
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Baal
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Posted: 10/25/2019 at 1:26pm |
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Heavyspin reminds me that Rule 70 was incomplete, which augers very well for his future enlightenment. Upon conferring with the Table Tennis Gods I have been ordered to update it. Ba'al has spoken.
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/25/2019 at 1:34pm |
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after a player asks us to play and we answer something like: "sorry I am tired I need a rest", respect a minimum delay before playing somebody else. a 2 minutes delay is rude; how long before it's not?
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/25/2019 at 1:41pm |
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do we cover the player who is constantly talking to somebody outside the court in between points?
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Baal
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Posted: 10/25/2019 at 1:51pm |
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It is inversely related to how much you care about being rude to that person. If you don't care, that duration could asymptotically approach zero. Note that Rule 70 now specifically states that there are no requirments for how long the stronger player should play with the weaker one, only that if you say you are done for the night then you really are done. Of course, in the case where the weaker person is very attractive then this duration (time the stronger player spends playing with the weaker one) could be quite long.
Edited by Baal - 10/25/2019 at 1:59pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/25/2019 at 2:01pm |
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47. If you converse with your playing partner (or someone outside the court), you should be barely audible at the next table.
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wturber
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Joined: 10/28/2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 3860 |
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Posted: 10/26/2019 at 11:13am |
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Bulloney. I have the name on the back of my shirt so I don't have to pin player numbers to my shirt at tournaments.
Makes no sense.
Makes no sense either. Some indoor soccer shoes make excellent table tennis shoes. Look at Nike's Mercurial line. Stopping here with ... Rule 81. Rule lists should not have more than ten entries. Edited by wturber - 10/26/2019 at 11:30am |
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Jay Turberville
www.jayandwanda.com Hardbat: Gambler Zebra Classic w/ Dr. Evil |
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/26/2019 at 12:26pm |
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Rule proposal: Passing gas in the playing hall is utterly rude but if it's impossible to avoid it should not happen above the passer's ass.
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/26/2019 at 12:46pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/26/2019 at 12:56pm |
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Such a person is abhorrent to the Gods of Table Tennis, so much so that they do not even make a rule about them. After all, does your state pass laws regulating porcupines? Of course not. Porcupines dont read, drive cars or play table tennis. And so it is with the people you just described.
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stiltt
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Posted: 10/26/2019 at 1:08pm |
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Baal
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Posted: 10/26/2019 at 4:44pm |
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And note that I bear no malice towards porcupines.
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JimT wrote: